Fixer’ upper…

The cushion on the couch is sagging in the middle. I’ve not noticed it so bad before. The one in the basement is totally worn out.

There’s a crack in the window upstairs. Paint is chipping from the exterior lantern and in need of a touch up. The front steps need to be re-stained. There’s green smutch growing on the back door.

The deck could do with a pressure wash…so could the house…and the eaves. Obviously the green smutch on the bottom of the door.

Suddenly things are looking a little worn and ragged. There’s dust under the dining room table. Such a heinous job to move everything out of the room and Murphy’s Oil the floors…but it needs to be done. I should haul all the rugs out…give them a good beating. A few closet doors are missing knobs.

The cupboard door in the bathroom doesn’t close quite right and I can’t figure out how to get the plug to work…so I just unscrewed it…leaving a gaping hole to the plumbing below.

The tubs still need to be caulked.

Boot marks are on the front door. My Mr. Clean Magic Eraser is no longer removing the dark circles…I’ll have to paint it. The lock mechanism needs replacing…you have to turn left not right. Not to mention the door downstairs is permanently closed.

Everything could do with a fresh coat of paint. Brighten things up. Dust out the cobwebs. Change the air filters. Empty the vacuum canister. Clean the garage. Remove the fly carcasses from the boob lights.

Figure out how they even got there!

Things are sagging…stuff needs to be changed…fixed…scrubbed. Paint is needed to cover up marks that weren’t there before. I should replace some filters. The green smutch has got to go.

Yesterday I turned forty two and dammit…I’m falling apart!

I don’t think smutch is a word.