I was heading to a hockey fundraiser with a group of friends and was about to shower, straighten my hair and iron my clothes when I found myself in complete darkness wondering if I’d paid my bill. I lit candles and poured myself a glass of wine, hung out with the dog, listened to my iPod and played with my Blackberry in the hopes the power would be restored. Eventually I gave in and got ready by candlelight… hoping beyond hope that the lights would be dim where I was headed. I teased my hair, found my most unwrinkled blouse and headed out. Totally ill prepared and uncomfortable with my powerless look.
I should have stayed home with my scared-of-the-dark dog.
There were Coach bags, Ugg boots, True Religion Jeans, Spa Getaways, Botox Injections and a Hangover Kit. Yup… two bags of saline solution and all the fixings to tap your veins and blast your body with energy. I considered hooking myself to the IV bag but was busy unsuccessfully searching for the lines on the faces of those trying to bid on the botox.
It was an auction perfectly suited to the cougars and the grey haired gents that accompanied them. I fit right in… sans the grey haired gent… but there were plenty of single greys to choose from. Unfortunately, in my wrinkled state in the brightly lit room, I wasn’t feeling it. I was content to discuss the inflated prices of purses and boots with the other hockey mom’s all too happy to have a big night out on the town.
Seeing people out of their natural habitat is pretty interesting, but the realization hit me that I spend too much time in the rink when I knew more than half the people in the pub, the team and position their child played including the number and the sponsor name on the back of each jersey. I left feeling a little let down, albeit holding a few good buys, wishing I could find a drive thru donair shop and that Crazy was in town to enjoy one with me… unfortunately she’s away at a hockey tournament. Go figure.
I arrived home to the house lit up like a Christmas tree with two tv’s explaining how to use the remote control and my son’s boom box blasting out music to an empty room. I began turning off everything that had been left on while my children were packing and heading off for the weekend, removed myself from my non branded clothing, washed my face while being careful to get deep into crevices of my non-botoxed face, turned off my unused flat iron and hit the sack with my very-happy-to-have-me-home-cause-when-the-power-came-back-on-it-freaked-her-out dog.
It’s a new night and there’s a party calling my name… all I have to do is straighten my hair, throw on a bit of makeup and iron a blouse. Sadly I’m not feeling the energy.
Instead… I’m lighting a few candles, pouring myself a glass of wine and turning on my iPod.
I could do with a saline drip
And a drive thru donair shop.