Because life wasn’t busy enough…I decided to sell my house.
You know, the one I love. With the amazing neighbours on Caring Court!
The one I thought I’d live in forever…or at least until I was dragged to a nursing home kicking and screaming.
I had no intention whatsoever to leave. To the point that I actually let the kids write their names on the wall in the roughed in bathroom. Neighbourhood children, sports teams, friends and family…signatures that in the next day or so…or when I get around to it…will be hidden behind a coat of paint.
And a tear or two.
I’m too sentimental. Always have been. This is the house where this happened…and that happened…and the other thing. Where we had that gathering…that celebration…that disappointment.
This is the house I struggled against…that embraced me. Where I finally found peace.
AND…as a reward for all its hard work and dedication…for keeping a roof over our heads…for keeping us warm and safe…I go and stick a For Sale sign on it like I just don’t care.
Fact is…I care…but things have gotten a little too much. Too big. Too hard.
There’s me…single…working my way towards making it big out there with a company and my little old blog…one kid about to move to France…one in High School and talking university in a few short years…the other not far behind him.
Still me…in this big, massive, wonderful home…with two teens getting ready to jump from the nest and a dog at my feet.
It just seems like too much all of a sudden.
In December, I spent a great number of hours looking at finances…at my heating costs, my taxes, the costs of maintaining this large family home. I totally believe that the last five years, keeping my kids on this street with these neighbours and everything they knew while our lives were tumbling around us…was the absolute right thing to do. These people, this place…it’s been a Godsend. BUT…like everything else…life changes. And change is good.
This is an adventure.
I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE THINKING…MY AMAZING OFFICE! I can hear you squealing and you’re right! However, it’s paint and wallpaper and the rest I’ll bring with me…plus, there’s brand new opportunity to decorate new space and we all know I love a DIY project!
So…if you’re wondering what’s been going on in May…why I’m over two weeks in with barely a post written and one pulled from the archives…it’s this. I’ve painted. I’ve scrubbed. I’ve cleaned. I’ve purged. I’ve watched my kids get rid of things they’ve long outgrown…watched Snuff climb a ladder and pressure wash my house…watched Dad turn into a handy-man once again. I’ve visited the dump…made several trips to Value Village…pulled my hair out…cried my eyes out…told my neighbours and received so much love and support. I sat on the front porch as the sign went on the house and did my best not to fall apart for fear of looking crazy. I’m working my tail off to keep this house clean despite the fact that we still have to live here.
I’m looking forward…to closing another chapter on my life…that weighs far more heavily on me than I realized before now. It’s not just the bills…not just that it’s a little too big for my ever-shrinking, growing up family…not just that I can’t keep up with the yard work and maintenance…it’s that it’s time to close the door.
Find the right fit…for me…in my new life…with those who share it with me.
Somewhere…I can feel at home.